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Blessings,
Sebastians’s Family
Letter from grandma Sue; first posted in the Marion Star….
“On this Father’s Day, I’d like to tell you about a special dad. He is
my son, and his name is Jeff. Jeff was born blind but he was a typical
baby getting into his dad’s stuff and all sorts of mischief. He was in
the Boy Scouts, he teased his sister. He graduated from River Valley
and The Ohio State University with a BA in British literature. At age
30, he married Carmon, a kindred spirit, 12 years his junior.
Jeff is a curmudgeon and Carmon is an admitted bibliophile but after
10 years of marriage, Jeff became a dad at the ripe old age of 40. The
little family spent one wonderful month together before Children’s
Services came to visit and ordered baby Sebastian out of the house
because of its unsafe condition. Mommy took him and moved in with her
folks.
Jeff and I set to clearing out the fallen plaster and clutter that had
accumulated over 10 years. He appealed to every social agency in
Marion but to no avail. He applied for low income housing but was
denied because he owned the property. He was despondent, fearing that
he would miss out on all his baby’s milestones. He only saw his baby
on the weekend.
When Carmon achieved her STNA certificate and got a job, we opened our
Waldo home to mommy, daddy and baby. Jeff could finally be a 24-7
hands-on daddy. Think about changing a messy diaper on a wriggling
six-month-old with your eyes closed. Contemplate keeping an energetic
toddler seated in a bathtub while you’re trying to bathe the slippery
little boy. Getting him into his clothes is a true exercise in
patience. Sebastian’s favorite place for nap time is daddy’s chest but
getting him to sleep is no easy chore, either. Jeff is learning
constantly.
Then there is the matter of keeping track of Sebastian. They bought a
“child locator.” It’s a little ladybug that clips on the back of
Sebastian’s clothing and when daddy can’t hear where Sebastian is, he
presses the activator on his key ring and the ladybug beeps.
Sebastian wears a harness when he and daddy go for a walk. Sebastian
can go anywhere in Waldo and Jeff always knows where home is. Jeff
knows every street with its own unique differences. In Marion however,
all the streets seem the same with houses everywhere – an impossible
maze for a blind dad with his toddler. Jeff wants his son to know the
joy of exploring the outdoors but he also wants to protect him from
the busy streets and any other present danger.
At the pancake and sausage benefit given by our Catholic friends, Jeff
overheard someone ask, “who is this family?” Well, the answer is: This
family is a mom and a dad struggling to pay their bills and provide
for their little boy. That describes a lot of new families but being
blind makes one so vulnerable. And when bad things happen, like people
stealing things from your home when you let them in to use the phone
or when someone steals your lawnmower from your backyard, your trust
in the goodness of humanity falters. And you put up walls. Jeff and
Carmon have a very small circle of friends.
So that’s what it’s like; Jeff being a dad someone said, “It takes a
village to raise a child.” That is only true if the people are
trustworthy. So, now I’m praying that God will put special neighbors
in this little family’s life so that this dad can be confident that
his little boy is having all the experiences necessary for his
happiness and development. Happy Father’s Day Jeff.”
Mom, Sue Swihart
Waldo